The Broadcast Pioneers of Philadelphia

Carter Merbreier (aka Captain Noah)
Broadcast Pioneers Luncheon
Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Written by Broadcast Pioneers member Carter Merbreier........

“MAKE UP!”
“God has given you one face,
And you make yourselves another.”
Hamlet

Bob Casey was our 42nd governor of Pennsylvania. When he visited our television station in early '79, just after he was elected, it was for the purpose of presenting his proposals for state government in a most favorable light. Under the impression that he had been elected Pope, or at least President of the United States, he brought with him, surrounding him, an impressive retinue of officialdom and state police.

His only request was for a makeup artist. He just wanted to look a smidge better for the close-ups.

But there was no such thing as a makeup artist at Channel Six. We were a frugal Cap Cities television station and did not enjoy such luxuries as make-up persons. “ Are you kidding? Even our anchors use the toilets to put on their make-up. Give me a break!”

The new governor came from the Pittsburgh area and did not know me nor my Captain Noah persona, from a hole-in-the-ground. So it was easy for me with a straight face to volunteer: "Did someone here request makeup services?"

I loosened his tie and put paper towels around his collar --- an action that seemed to assure him, and indeed his entire company of handlers, that I was a professional. .I only had my own Max Factor pancake makeup and a few clean rubber sponges. Plus, Mrs. Noah’s eyebrow pencil, should I need it..

I used my wife's eyebrow pencil to define and color his bushy eyebrows and coated his five-o’clock shadow several times with the Max Factor #5 soaked sponge

"You look pretty good to me, Governor." I said.as I stepped back to view him in the dressing room mirror.

“Damn,” I thought, “ I did do a beautiful job max-factoring his five o’clock shadow.”

With that his entourage of uniformed state police, plain-clothes men talking into their lapels, press consultant, secretary, and communications adviser … who had been jam-packed into our small dressing room,…moved in a pack behind the show’s producer toward studio one for the live TV interview. Holding the door to the studio, with barely two minutes ‘til air-time, Gary gave me a quick smile of appreciation.

Shortly after the taping, I had occasion to walk through the newsroom, where the anchor Jim Gardner, who had hosted the interview, sat in his cubicle. “Have you ever” he loudly suggested with a twinkle in his eye “ have you ever thought of going into the funeral business, Captain?”

There followed the sounds of stifled laughter. They knew. They all knew.

Shortly thereafter, at the plexiglass Guard Station, I passed the weatherman Dave (Boreanaz) Roberts, coming in from the parking lot. As he went by me, he pointedly inquired,” Have you seen the governor; lately?”

“No, I haven’t - why”.

“Well, I just saw the state police driving him back to Harrisburg and he looked like death-warmed-over.”

“ Ha – Ha - Very funny “. I replied.

I have raised millions of dollars for charity at “fish-bowl” drops at countless telethons, hosted Special Olympic Games, delivered Santa Claus via local fire-trucks in hundreds of Shopping Mall Thanksgiving Parades, and with my clergy background performed numerous weddings and funerals within the broadcasting community. But I will never again share my genius and extraordinary talent using Max Factor makeup with another soul after Governor Casey. Nor for that matter, have I ever been asked to.

The e-mail address of the Broadcast Pioneers of Philadelphia is pioneers@broadcastpioneers.com